When I got done with a swim a couple weeks ago, I got into the Jacuzzi to relax. There was a gentleman sitting across from me. As I got in, he saw my IM tattoo. He asked me about my tattoo and how was it. Then, he asked me a very specific question that I hadn't been asked before. He asked "What motivated you?" , not "Why did you do that" but what motivated me. He then asked what would I say to motivate someone to do something. I told him that everyone is different. People get motivated differently. For some it takes tragedy, a decline in health, a motivational movie, a song, a quote, or a friend making a comment.
For myself, it took tragedy. My biological Father passed away when I was 15, after that my Step Father took the role as my Dad and did a great job at it. He attended all my games I cheered at, came to my soccer games, picked me up from school a lot, and was very supportive. Any chance I could on the weekends or during school breaks I'd be in the truck with him on the way to the barn to work. He'd always have me drive him around once I got my permit, saying he's done it for me enough, which he had. I loved driving his truck around town with him running errands, getting breakfast, etc. My Dad wasn't a saint, but so long as you didn't make him too upset he was a laid back guy.
In August, he had a pacemaker put in but never really recovered from surgery. He had to go back in surgery in October, which he got MRSA from. He was re-admitted to the hospital for the MRSA treatment in November, I got to visit him on Thanksgiving, which was the 21st. I left back to Pensacola. A week later, my Mom called me that he got pneumonia and told me hospice was called and that I needed to get back soon. I had planned on leaving right after work on December 1st. That morning, at work, my Mom tried calling me, my phone was in my pocket and I saw it was her. I didn't answer it the first time but when she called me a second time within seconds, I knew what I was about to find out. I went to the back to answer and my Mom was sobbing in the phone. My Dad had died. They told the funeral home to pick him up later in the evening so that I could get there to say goodbye. I left work immediately, stopped by my house to get my dog and a few things and rushed to the road.
A few weeks prior, I had an exam done, was just suppose to be a routine yearly exam. But results weren't good. So, I had a minor procedure/exam done to further check to see what was going on. As I was driving to Ocala, to see my dead Father, I got a phone call from my Doctor. They found cancerous cells in my uterus and to make sure this wouldn't progress they'd have to remove parts of my uterus. Just the news I needed, right?
When I arrived to my home in Ocala, my older brother, older sister, younger brother, and Mom were there. My Dad was laying in a hospital bed in the middle of the living room, lifeless. I normally don't touch the dead, I know some people during a viewing will touch the hand of the deceased but it had always scared me to do. But, with my Dad I sat by his side, touched his chest, he was cold, and I was stupidly hoping that at any moment he would just take a breath. Come back to me. But he didn't. That was by far the hardest and worst moment of my life.
Following my Dad's death I went into a terrible slump. All I did was work and then go home and lay on the couch. And cry randomly. I was so upset. I officially had no Dad. At 21 I'd lost two Fathers. I wanted to do nothing but cry, try to sleep, and lay on the couch. Finally, as the new year was approaching I realized this wasn't right. I shouldn't be wasting my life, My Dad's had lost theirs, but I didn't lose mine. They wouldn't want me crying everyday and just laying on the couch. I'd obviously gained some weight and was at my heaviest and lowest mentally. So, I made it my new years resolution to just run. Run my frustrations, emotions, pain, and run in a race at least once each month of 2013. In June, I signed up for sprint triathlon and that's when I fell in love with triathlon. In 2013, I completed my first real 5k, 10k, half marathon, AND marathon! Around September, that's when I decided I was going to do an Ironman. At first, it was suppose to be with some friends, but they bailed but I stuck to it.
In 2014, I completed my first Olympic distance tri, Half Ironman and full Ironman. Now, I'm in the best shape I've ever been and I'm also the happiest I've ever been. I have a supportive and awesome job, a very supportive and sweet boyfriend, a great coach, and an amazing group of friends.
That is what motivated me. But everyone is different. Everyday, now I'm motivated by the new goals and dreams that I have for myself, which I'm not ready to fully share yet.
Whether its you find out you have high blood pressure, you lost your loved one, you realize you can do more/be better, find your motivation and go after your goals. Be patient though, Rome wasn't built in a day.
